honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
