When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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