he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
sarcasm needs its own font
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
