To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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