So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
he shaved USA in his pubs
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
