I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
We talked him into tasing himself.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Randomize
