what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize