Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
