i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Randomize
