Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
