Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Randomize
