i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Randomize
