I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
