Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
