so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize