I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
