I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
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