Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
