i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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