She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize