You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize