well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
