your thong is hanging out like whoa
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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