my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
