hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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