the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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