even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
