Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
