mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
