I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
