How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
