marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
