I could make wine with my vomit
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
