i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize