He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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