Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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