bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i dont even know how to be here
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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