So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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