ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Randomize
