even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
