He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
