talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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