just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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