If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
