So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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