So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
