People in love make me want to vomit
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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