just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize