The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
