I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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